I am angry. mad. disappointed. FRUSTRATED. I love my life but I am reviled with myself. It’s something I cannot seem to fathom. I’m in constant dialogues with myself BUT I know it just makes me more closed. sad. depressed.
Reasons for this? I am not really sure. BUT MAYBE…
1) A biological father who is not really ready to commit to a reunion. Why even bother to connect? Yes I think your money helps. Well, it helps a lot. BUT I am not really certain it is for the right reasons. You are connecting because you want to feel less guilty. You are not really out there to fill the void of my fatherless childhood.
2) Work.
3) Can’t seem to finish what I start + Can’t seem to reach my dreams.
I am all these things as of. But I still hope. God knows. He’s my real father.