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Posted by on 2014/08/10 under Uncategorized

Whatever I did, I did to make him proud. Finally, when my God, when His image shattered before me. I couldn’t handle it.My father never loved me. He still does not.He can never love another person selflessly.He was just using those who look up to him as a tool to show his greatness to others, by projecting us as people who cannot handle life without his direction.

Years later, I tears well up when I think of my childhood. Half of my life, I spend trying to make someone proud by being everything I actually wasn’t till I saw how ‘proud’ he was. For the rest of my life, I struggle with my memories. When will I get over them.

When will I be finally free?

When will I really feel… feel something good, something beautiful, something that I can hold on to?

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