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Posted by on 2011/07/31 under Uncategorized

So i’m dating a man who is older than me, married, has four kids. I love him so much. I feel alive and happy when i am with him. But sometimes i get the feeling it wont ever work out the way i dream of. How can i expect someone to leave their family and start one with me? Isn’t that crazy? I dont wanna give up, i tell myself im okay with this, that it keeps me focused, that he can never get tired of me this way. But then i have days when i jealous and i wonder how he is with his wife…if they do things when they sleep together. Sometimes i think…wow im a homewrecker. But i know im not the first he has done this with. And i just hope im the last…he has helped me with so many things. My life is going is such a better direction than if i wasnt with him. He helps me see things in a whole new life. But i miss him so much, almost all the time. Im scared that one day he will say…hey maybe we should just be friends. I seen somethings and heard things that i can never erase from my memory. Things that i cant get over. I truly love him, he’s not the first i’ve been with. But he is definatly the realest. The one that makes me happy. I wish i could have met him in earlier time, that i was older….maybe in the next life. If i had a choice. I would want him in my next life. If there’s such a thing. I would give him all the love he deserves…so much that he wouldnt think twice about another woman. I would make me as happy as i feel with him….help him learn about life, the way he is helping me. What do i do? I dont wanna be without him, but sometimes IM MY WORST ENEMY!!!!!

One thought on “31-07-11(0:19:47)

  1. Hugs and Kisses says:

    You cannot hold on to this!!! Trust me been there and done that. You will not be fully satisfied. You are chasing a unicorn that will never be caught. Go ahead and let someone else love u!!! It will all be worth it and end in the end u will find true happiness. U are not a home wrecker for him to leave the house was already broken and the way u came in is the way u came out. U r much more than that and u deserve to be loved in full.

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