i talk to myself
you can write it all down
you can be your own best friend
also you can get into yoga meditations tai chi
kung fu
it all helps
these things help u focus on there is no alone only the illusion of being alone
we all connected
just many are ignorant to see it
Look, we may all be people going through tough times but that doesnt mean we are all united. Cause if someone is hurt and all alone they most certainly wont have the whole world to count on. They need to have someone they can turn to and unfortunately that is sometimes taken for granted. My point is, that we may all be united through songs and experiences and all, but when you are in need of a shoulder to cry on, who can you turn to when nobody is there?
Good question, I just keep it to myself… I don’t tell people when I have/am having panic attacks… I just force myself to get though it and deal with it on my own… I’m on my own now, I know that there are others out there but I’m not close to anyone, which is the hard part
I feel you… Do you have snapchat? Maybe we could talk there and I could try to help you out on reasonable hours cause I dont know when you read those and reply
Its how you look at it,change your perspective your world changes. im talking from experience i have been there! how u think i survived and got through it all? i had to learn to be there for myself and only myself and thats all mostly that you have at the end of the day, talk to yourself you are your own best friend, forget others,forget needing them, people CHANGE love changes, they may not want you one day, because people change, but your love for yourself stays the same, so learn to love yourself, its the only way, its an INNER WAR. we are connected, its pure ignorance to believe otherwise.
There is always a way and there is always hope u need someone to cry too, cry to yourself cry to god go buy a pet and hug the dog. Talk to trees talk to the sky talk to the sea. phone the samaritans. phone the church. go phone a doc. i have been there. i know its damn hard. but there is no option but to continue we are survivors, some of us were born in the deep end of the sea, and life is a struggle,but we are all a part of the big sea CONNECTED.
The first stage of self mastery: How to go inwards
To me, going inwards means putting my attention into my internal environment – not only what is happening around me, but what is happening within me.
What is this buzzing of life energy incased within this body of mine? Who or what is “Malavika” and why is she delighted by some things and dismayed by others?
A life of reaction
Right now, this is our life – something happens in the outside world, and then something happens inside us. For example – Today it begins to rain outside. Perhaps on this particular day, this is bad news to us for many reasons. And so it rains inside us.
But if we learn to love the rain as much as we learn to love when it doesn’t rain, then it doesn’t matter what happens to us. Because we will always love what is.
Self mastery and creation
After a certain level of mastery over ourselves, we can decide exactly what happens within us. We become conscious creators of our life and what happens in it, and leave less up to “destiny.”
We can choose whether we are full of peace or full of anger. Do we have a choice right now? Well, I don’t think I do. Not yet anyway. Usually, something happens to me in my life, and it fills me with something I have little say over. It changes me and I am consumed by it for that time.
And because of this, I have little ability to change and influence my life. Things happen to me and I react to everything. Until we have a certain degree of mastery over our internal world, anything and everything can happen to us outwardly.
And when we have a choice of what happens within us, wouldn’t we always choose to be filled with peace? It just makes sense – smoother living. When we are filled with peace, we are finally free to choose how we want to be in this world.
The steps to Self mastery
Step 1. Go within and get to know the terrain of your inner self.
Step 2. Look at different aspects of yourself and learn how their work. Then, figure out how to switch out of auto pilot and get into the drivers seat of these unconscious processes.
Let’s get there together. Let’s start today.
The Intent
Today, I am not here to assert my personality and my story into life. Today, I am here to experience life for what it is. I am here to experience the world. With this mindset, I naturally go inwards. I become silent. And life becomes more wonderful and extraordinary than I can even comprehend, that I can barely even speak about it.
Sit Quietly
Oh, how difficult it can be to just sit and be. It can be difficult for many reasons. It can be difficult because we are used to such a high level of external stimulation that the pulses of our soul are just not enough for us anymore. We need something. We need to check on our e-mail, on our messages, on our friends, and on our enemies. We need to check on the news or the book we are reading. We can’t bear the possibility of being bored.
“Only boring people get bored.” – Ruth Burke
Or maybe sitting and being is difficult because our darkness, our negativity, our stories consume us and it hurts to replay these terrible movies in our mind.
Whatever your reason is, let us sit with it anyway.
Today, take some time to sit and notice everything. Be completely aware of your space you are in.
So often we forget to take the time to look around and to be aware of our surroundings and ourselves. We tend to rush into things – places, situations, relationships, emotions, people. Instead, lets take a few moments to just look at it first.
In the morning, you wake up, and you just sit and be. Feel what kind of state you are in this morning, what is your body asking for this morning? How does your space feel this morning? What is happening around you today? Is your loved one anxious about something, or are they distant and feeling unloved. There is just so much we miss about our own lives because we forget to notice.
Overflow with Love
This is a powerful exercise. Close your eyes and think of someone or something dear to you; a person, a plant, a moment. You can bring your palms together at the level of the heart center in Namasakar. Then try to generate the highest level of emotion or energy that you can towards it. Let that feeling overflow and sit with that bliss for some time. Hold this for at least 2 minutes. Practice this daily. Keep finding more and more things to love.
Bring gifts of kindness wherever you go
Wherever you go today, you may bless that place with a gift. It does not have to be a material gift. It may be a gift of kindness and intention. It may be a smile, a prayer, a touch, acceptance, forgiveness, support, strength, the telling of a truth. In whatever situation you find yourself today, ask yourself “what is the gift I can bring with me into this moment, in this place, for this person.”
Silence
Silence is golden. Do you sometimes have an incessant commentary in your mind while you go about your day – commenting on everything you are doing, berating you for the mistakes you have made, or the embarrassment you have caused yourself? Can you imagine if this internal voice was audible to all? How awful would it be to go about your day broadcasting this fickle narrative that we tend to conduct our lives by.
And the worst part is that this voice often influences how we act in life as well. It holds us back, traps us, or it pushes us to do compulsive things just to keep it quiet (which is short lived anyway).
This is why practicing silence is important. Set aside a couple of activities in your day that you will complete in silence (that means putting the Ipod away too, I’m afraid.)
We think we are being silent when we stop talking, and in the main sense of the word – we are. But all we are really doing is listening to the chatter in our mind instead of talking. And that doesn’t feel “golden” to us at all because it rarely gives us peace, and it rarely adds value to our life.
The first step to changing that voice, is to meet it. So spend some time in silence. Just notice what comes up knowing that you do not have to act on it. Over time, that voice will quieten too. And what you will be left with, is golden.
Speak Golden Words
Silence is Golden and so are the words we speak. The words we speak have the capacity to alter us. Sound was one of the first things to exist in the creation of the universe, and holds a lot of power.
Today, decide that you will only speak Golden words. This means you will think about what you will say, and speak with a certain gracefulness. With words, we can do so much, words have a place in the creation process and so, today, decide that you will avoid hateful words, negative words.
Decide that you will speak beautiful, wise words. That you will speak with strength, and honesty. That you will speak truth. Decide that you will speak enough, that you will not speak too much, nor too little. Decide you will always say what is necessary in a beautiful and wise way. Decide that you will use your words to uplift those around you. Decide that you will use your words to create what you desire.
Respect in the face of disrespect
Another practice for going inwards is to embody respect in the face of disrespect. And why is this? Because respect comes from within, it is created internally.
When someone is disrespectful to you in anyway whats so over, where does it hurt? It hurts inside. And when something hurts inside, it greatly and unconsciously influences how we act and who we are.
To become conscious of this process is part of our inner work and we can do this by practicing respect and grace in the face of disrespect.
Interact Gracefully
In order to conduct your life in a graceful way, means to be conscious of where you are, what the situation requires, and who you are. It is however, important to remember that consciousness is different to self-consciousness.
Because engaging with the people you come across in your day of “going inwards”, take a moment to be completely conscious and aware of the many dynamics at play. Be soft yet strong, understanding and clear, speak truth with kind words and clarity, bring gifts of kindness to every interaction. Make a heart connection with all that you meet, even if it is just a short 10 second interaction. It makes a difference.
Consistently reorient yourself towards your highest self
Our spiritual path is not one we set for ourselves once and that’s it. It requires constant reminders and adjustments. The pull of our karma and autopilot will always pull us back and so you have to keep reminding yourself of your highest self and best life. These daily reminders can be in the form of reading, writing (for me – writing my blog is a huge reminder), watching, conversations, contemplation etc.
Receptivity
Increase your receptivity by choosing today to listen, feel, notice, and of course, to close your eyes and and know.
Wow, thank you all for your kind words… I spent today focusing on myself and what I wanted… I had a craving for ice cream, so I got ice cream. I then spent the day working out and stretching my body, something that was far overdue. And then I spend some time stretching and feeling my body and quieting my mind. I wish I had the time to do these things every day, but as we all know, life is busy.
I miss the old me. The me I was a few years ago when everything was new and the world was at my fingertips… Now I’ve just settled and I’m not happy. Depression is genetic and it’s hitting me now. I’m doing my best to control it, by it’s more difficult than I thought. I don’t want to seek the help of doctors because I don’t believe in shoving tons of pills down my throat. I’m taking I one day at a time.
I didn’t expect all these comments, so let me just say thank you to everyone, all your words have helped.
I’v lost everyone as well, dad, mom, bro and it sucks like hell.
I have two kids, but damn they never call never show up, and one is right next door. I can honestly say I am all alone as well. Know how you feel. hang in there.
i can help if you want
It’d help
Well, would you like me to be your friend ?
fiend or friend that is the question.
Friend 🙂
I’d appreciate that… It just sucks to lose everyone around you and not have anyone to talk to… Bottling it in hurts
i talk to myself
you can write it all down
you can be your own best friend
also you can get into yoga meditations tai chi
kung fu
it all helps
these things help u focus on there is no alone only the illusion of being alone
we all connected
just many are ignorant to see it
Look, we may all be people going through tough times but that doesnt mean we are all united. Cause if someone is hurt and all alone they most certainly wont have the whole world to count on. They need to have someone they can turn to and unfortunately that is sometimes taken for granted. My point is, that we may all be united through songs and experiences and all, but when you are in need of a shoulder to cry on, who can you turn to when nobody is there?
Good question, I just keep it to myself… I don’t tell people when I have/am having panic attacks… I just force myself to get though it and deal with it on my own… I’m on my own now, I know that there are others out there but I’m not close to anyone, which is the hard part
I feel you… Do you have snapchat? Maybe we could talk there and I could try to help you out on reasonable hours cause I dont know when you read those and reply
Lol, I’m always on Snapchat and I appreciate you wanting to really help me out… I just don’t want to be posting any personal info on this site
Yeah, thats true , I get it 🙂
Its how you look at it,change your perspective your world changes. im talking from experience i have been there! how u think i survived and got through it all? i had to learn to be there for myself and only myself and thats all mostly that you have at the end of the day, talk to yourself you are your own best friend, forget others,forget needing them, people CHANGE love changes, they may not want you one day, because people change, but your love for yourself stays the same, so learn to love yourself, its the only way, its an INNER WAR. we are connected, its pure ignorance to believe otherwise.
There is always a way and there is always hope u need someone to cry too, cry to yourself cry to god go buy a pet and hug the dog. Talk to trees talk to the sky talk to the sea. phone the samaritans. phone the church. go phone a doc. i have been there. i know its damn hard. but there is no option but to continue we are survivors, some of us were born in the deep end of the sea, and life is a struggle,but we are all a part of the big sea CONNECTED.
Malavika Suresh
A spiritual lifestyle blog
The first stage of self mastery: How to go inwards
To me, going inwards means putting my attention into my internal environment – not only what is happening around me, but what is happening within me.
What is this buzzing of life energy incased within this body of mine? Who or what is “Malavika” and why is she delighted by some things and dismayed by others?
A life of reaction
Right now, this is our life – something happens in the outside world, and then something happens inside us. For example – Today it begins to rain outside. Perhaps on this particular day, this is bad news to us for many reasons. And so it rains inside us.
But if we learn to love the rain as much as we learn to love when it doesn’t rain, then it doesn’t matter what happens to us. Because we will always love what is.
Self mastery and creation
After a certain level of mastery over ourselves, we can decide exactly what happens within us. We become conscious creators of our life and what happens in it, and leave less up to “destiny.”
We can choose whether we are full of peace or full of anger. Do we have a choice right now? Well, I don’t think I do. Not yet anyway. Usually, something happens to me in my life, and it fills me with something I have little say over. It changes me and I am consumed by it for that time.
And because of this, I have little ability to change and influence my life. Things happen to me and I react to everything. Until we have a certain degree of mastery over our internal world, anything and everything can happen to us outwardly.
And when we have a choice of what happens within us, wouldn’t we always choose to be filled with peace? It just makes sense – smoother living. When we are filled with peace, we are finally free to choose how we want to be in this world.
The steps to Self mastery
Step 1. Go within and get to know the terrain of your inner self.
Step 2. Look at different aspects of yourself and learn how their work. Then, figure out how to switch out of auto pilot and get into the drivers seat of these unconscious processes.
Let’s get there together. Let’s start today.
The Intent
Today, I am not here to assert my personality and my story into life. Today, I am here to experience life for what it is. I am here to experience the world. With this mindset, I naturally go inwards. I become silent. And life becomes more wonderful and extraordinary than I can even comprehend, that I can barely even speak about it.
Sit Quietly
Oh, how difficult it can be to just sit and be. It can be difficult for many reasons. It can be difficult because we are used to such a high level of external stimulation that the pulses of our soul are just not enough for us anymore. We need something. We need to check on our e-mail, on our messages, on our friends, and on our enemies. We need to check on the news or the book we are reading. We can’t bear the possibility of being bored.
“Only boring people get bored.” – Ruth Burke
Or maybe sitting and being is difficult because our darkness, our negativity, our stories consume us and it hurts to replay these terrible movies in our mind.
Whatever your reason is, let us sit with it anyway.
Today, take some time to sit and notice everything. Be completely aware of your space you are in.
So often we forget to take the time to look around and to be aware of our surroundings and ourselves. We tend to rush into things – places, situations, relationships, emotions, people. Instead, lets take a few moments to just look at it first.
In the morning, you wake up, and you just sit and be. Feel what kind of state you are in this morning, what is your body asking for this morning? How does your space feel this morning? What is happening around you today? Is your loved one anxious about something, or are they distant and feeling unloved. There is just so much we miss about our own lives because we forget to notice.
Overflow with Love
This is a powerful exercise. Close your eyes and think of someone or something dear to you; a person, a plant, a moment. You can bring your palms together at the level of the heart center in Namasakar. Then try to generate the highest level of emotion or energy that you can towards it. Let that feeling overflow and sit with that bliss for some time. Hold this for at least 2 minutes. Practice this daily. Keep finding more and more things to love.
Bring gifts of kindness wherever you go
Wherever you go today, you may bless that place with a gift. It does not have to be a material gift. It may be a gift of kindness and intention. It may be a smile, a prayer, a touch, acceptance, forgiveness, support, strength, the telling of a truth. In whatever situation you find yourself today, ask yourself “what is the gift I can bring with me into this moment, in this place, for this person.”
Silence
Silence is golden. Do you sometimes have an incessant commentary in your mind while you go about your day – commenting on everything you are doing, berating you for the mistakes you have made, or the embarrassment you have caused yourself? Can you imagine if this internal voice was audible to all? How awful would it be to go about your day broadcasting this fickle narrative that we tend to conduct our lives by.
And the worst part is that this voice often influences how we act in life as well. It holds us back, traps us, or it pushes us to do compulsive things just to keep it quiet (which is short lived anyway).
This is why practicing silence is important. Set aside a couple of activities in your day that you will complete in silence (that means putting the Ipod away too, I’m afraid.)
We think we are being silent when we stop talking, and in the main sense of the word – we are. But all we are really doing is listening to the chatter in our mind instead of talking. And that doesn’t feel “golden” to us at all because it rarely gives us peace, and it rarely adds value to our life.
The first step to changing that voice, is to meet it. So spend some time in silence. Just notice what comes up knowing that you do not have to act on it. Over time, that voice will quieten too. And what you will be left with, is golden.
Speak Golden Words
Silence is Golden and so are the words we speak. The words we speak have the capacity to alter us. Sound was one of the first things to exist in the creation of the universe, and holds a lot of power.
Today, decide that you will only speak Golden words. This means you will think about what you will say, and speak with a certain gracefulness. With words, we can do so much, words have a place in the creation process and so, today, decide that you will avoid hateful words, negative words.
Decide that you will speak beautiful, wise words. That you will speak with strength, and honesty. That you will speak truth. Decide that you will speak enough, that you will not speak too much, nor too little. Decide you will always say what is necessary in a beautiful and wise way. Decide that you will use your words to uplift those around you. Decide that you will use your words to create what you desire.
Respect in the face of disrespect
Another practice for going inwards is to embody respect in the face of disrespect. And why is this? Because respect comes from within, it is created internally.
When someone is disrespectful to you in anyway whats so over, where does it hurt? It hurts inside. And when something hurts inside, it greatly and unconsciously influences how we act and who we are.
To become conscious of this process is part of our inner work and we can do this by practicing respect and grace in the face of disrespect.
Interact Gracefully
In order to conduct your life in a graceful way, means to be conscious of where you are, what the situation requires, and who you are. It is however, important to remember that consciousness is different to self-consciousness.
Because engaging with the people you come across in your day of “going inwards”, take a moment to be completely conscious and aware of the many dynamics at play. Be soft yet strong, understanding and clear, speak truth with kind words and clarity, bring gifts of kindness to every interaction. Make a heart connection with all that you meet, even if it is just a short 10 second interaction. It makes a difference.
Consistently reorient yourself towards your highest self
Our spiritual path is not one we set for ourselves once and that’s it. It requires constant reminders and adjustments. The pull of our karma and autopilot will always pull us back and so you have to keep reminding yourself of your highest self and best life. These daily reminders can be in the form of reading, writing (for me – writing my blog is a huge reminder), watching, conversations, contemplation etc.
Receptivity
Increase your receptivity by choosing today to listen, feel, notice, and of course, to close your eyes and and know.
I hope you are all having a beautiful Tuesday.
Blessings.
Wow, thank you all for your kind words… I spent today focusing on myself and what I wanted… I had a craving for ice cream, so I got ice cream. I then spent the day working out and stretching my body, something that was far overdue. And then I spend some time stretching and feeling my body and quieting my mind. I wish I had the time to do these things every day, but as we all know, life is busy.
I miss the old me. The me I was a few years ago when everything was new and the world was at my fingertips… Now I’ve just settled and I’m not happy. Depression is genetic and it’s hitting me now. I’m doing my best to control it, by it’s more difficult than I thought. I don’t want to seek the help of doctors because I don’t believe in shoving tons of pills down my throat. I’m taking I one day at a time.
I didn’t expect all these comments, so let me just say thank you to everyone, all your words have helped.
Hey lone ranger, me tonto….
I’v lost everyone as well, dad, mom, bro and it sucks like hell.
I have two kids, but damn they never call never show up, and one is right next door. I can honestly say I am all alone as well. Know how you feel. hang in there.
We can be alone together!