I dont even know what to do with my life anymore.. I fell in love with a guy whos a total ass. He cheated on me, never really cared about my feelings, yet I still love him. I met him two years ago and I thought we would be together forever. I was wrong. I moves out of state and away from him, and my bestfriend. I really dont know what to say to him anymore but most of all I miss my bestfriend.. I’ve decided to give up in him. I dont know what else to do… I miss Maddy so much.. I feel li k,e I could die. I want to die. I need to die. It’s the only thing that will make it better.. I cry myself to sleep constantly.. I need a love life, I need friends but I cant find any of that here.. Also lately, my past has been back up in my thoughts… I was malested twice and almost raped once.. I keep having dreams of commuting suicide but I know it isn’t healthy.. I feel so alone.. Is there anyone left out there?..
Of course there are people out there. And everything is going to be ok, okay? So don’t even think about suicide because everything gets better. Things might get better tomorrow and by taking your own life, you will never see that. Even after the darkest of nights, the sun still rises. So maybe this moment in time is not the best. And maybe you feel so alone and lonely and scared. But there are people who will be there for you, no matter what. Look ahead, never look back. .xx